I have been sitting here for weeks with this blog post in draft status. Each time I sit down to finish, the words somehow escape me and I am left staring at a blank screen. How can I adequately put into words what I felt while photographing this beautiful family. 

This family.

This beautiful family of four who I have been blessed to call friends. This family who, to many will now only look like three. I could talk about the immense love they so clearly have for each other. I could tell you about the way Nick glances at Kate and you can tell she is his world. I could say they look down at their baby boy Eamonn, as if he hung the stars. Because all of that is true. But than there is this other side. The side I know too well. The look of longing, the pain in their eyes because part of them is missing. A piece of their heart is gone forever. They are so excited for family photos and if you didn’t know you would never know. To the world they appear the ever care free new parents happily doting on their sweet new babe. Because they are. But they are also dealing with an immense grief. A few months ago my amazing, courageous friends were forced  to say good bye to their gorgeous son Ruan, Eamonn’s twin brother. How do you adequately put into words the joy and the love and the sorrow and the grief. The millions of emotions that swirl around your brain when your child dies. You just don’t.

There are zero words to say when someone loses a child. It just shouldn’t happen. But it does. This sweet life that was, but oh so briefly. He was here. He matters. Ruan. A strong name for such a strong little man.

I loved this session.  But it was raw. I knew it would be an emotional session for me and it was. I admire Nick and Kate so much. I am honored to have captured their sweet family.